My Poetry

Through every weathered storm, you can still find the moments of peace. Filling your heart with warmth and awareness is hard, yes. But oh, the day you look up and find that beauty is but the surface of your forever peace. Don’t be misled if your forever peace changes. For you should know that nothing is promised forever. But do not dwell, you live a new day every day. And life is never promised or forever. So live each day with purpose and intention. You have one life but you live every single day.

A part of me feels like I don't deserve to have a good life. I look around and notice accomplishments others achieve and I feel proud for them. Except, when it happens to me, I can't help but think If I truly earned it. I know I am good, but something claws at me like an nscratchable itch, begging to be relieved. A constant battle neither side wins.

I don't remember when it happened, but when it did a part of me was ripped off. All of the bubbling sensations suddenly stopped. A knot formed from inside my heart, and got stuck. As it lingered, I grew used to the feeling. I learned that this is how it’s supposed to be. Everything I tried made it worse; Apparently all I needed was someone to untie the knot.

How is it we place band-aids over wounds that gouge so deep? Wounds that cry for tender care— for love no band-aid could ever give. So why do we cover without truly tending? Simple fixes. Oh, but this isn’t really about band-aids. It’s about never understanding why they didn’t give you the answer you needed. Or… was it about the love you never saw as a child? Our wounds are different, but they still hurt because we only put band-aids on.

To my mother, I am so grateful for the boundless empathy you have. For you have spread that gift to me, and oh, how lonely it can be. To feel so deeply for others, yet seldom find the same reflected back. It’s a bottomless pit which will never be filled. But the beauty I find to understand others is irreplaceable; and how it lifts me when one says: You are such a beautiful person. How could I ever be upset for a gift that can be recognized in a swift pass. For as lonely as it may be, Those who recognize and appreciate it, help put a net in the bottomless pit.

My mind wanders and I'm stuck again. Tied up in whatever meaningless moment you drilled into my head. To put up a fight would be useless; because the rope tightens, relentless, like your voice echoing in my mind. But to give up and accept, that demands a strength I don’t have.

Love with you, Love with me. Love by far, Love by near. Our love is connected beyond. Oh, how simple it is with you.

My heart captures the sudden bursts when I think of you. I think about the way you look at me, talk with me, and how we are the same when together. Our differences disappear to reveal the souls that have been torn apart. Finally in your presence, I am whole again.

To see love, you must surrender the idea of it in your head. Love is a profound experience, but it is not the same for all. Some experience love the way a waterfall rushes down. Some experience it the way a river runs. And maybe some experience love the way a lake or ocean gathers waves. To whatever experience you have does not matter; it only matters where the love ends up. Hopefully it ends up creating a pond; the calm ripples echoing what they show. To toss a stone in and see how quietly water changes; trusting the other to hold the weight when it pulls you down.

I know I shouldn’t think it's my fault. But maybe it is. I’ve given up reaching for you. ‘Cause every time I try, you make me feel like I’m nothing to you. You never think to call, to text— I’m a fading shadow in your mind. But maybe you want it that way, I just wish you said it, instead of dragging me along.